Explanation.

Yes, I often find many reasons to account for my actions and feelings to people. In the end, those explanations bunch up into a messy yarn. Complicated, impossible to disentangle. But there is always an ultimate reason to all these complications. My confession is because I am possessive and selfish and in need of attention. And there are a lot of people out there like me. Still it makes me feel unpleasant to know that I'm not a very good person. Like when my friend ended up with a guy I like, I felt uncomfortable. I feel like I already lost something and I was scared that I might lose something else. Her friendship, maybe. That is a little extreme. More likely possible is her attention or her adoration. And if I was to not have that, I would feel abandoned. I hated that feeling. I really did not want to feel that insecurity again. Ohhh how selfish I am, really. People say that no one is perfect, but I really want to be a good person.